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August 29 Like . LoveSent to The Straits Times on Friday, 29 August 2008 Like. Love In the midst of searching for the "right one", most of us seem to be fixated at "feelings" as the barometer of "love". Feelings are wonderful beings. They hold us up, and give us strength to brave seemingly impossible odds and uncertain destinies. Feelings are perceptions our "heart" decide due mostly to due to a myraid of chemical reactions contributed by our eyeballs, nostrils, ears, skin and tongue. Little can we control the manfestation of feelings, though to some extent, experience and perceptions may affect these wonderous beings. Feelings held many of us holding ideals and expectations beyond what we really are seeking. Feelings tell us how much we "like" someone. Enough to go out with this person on occasions, or give "love" a chance. Feelings also means that we can and will "like" many at the same time. We follow up on our "likes" to decide. We decide how much responsiblilties we wish to undertake towards each "like". We decide to "love". Decisions come with responsibilities. Love is a decision. It comes mostly with feelings, and it can come in the absense of. I hope many of us can choose to love, than to like love. Deciding to love gives us the constant security and solumn determination to rekindle feelings as they come and go with the chemical reactions in our bodies. I hope this will allow many of us to choose the right one, than to feel for one too many. August 24 Beneath the National FlagSaturday, 23 August 2008. A letter in the Straits Times rebutting that it is due to more foreigners who stay in the HDB flats resulting in less National Flags being hosted in HDB estates. Foreigners usually stay in condominums, and condominiums are fully flagged.
I take his last point that Singaporeans do not understand the trials of staying in foreign countries. That is probably why we are seeing less flags. The replacement rate of Singaporeans has been below 2 for about a decade. Singapore citizenship has increased from 2.8 (est) to 4 million in about a decade. That refers to an influx of many many new citizens, which is not a bad thing.
Comparing the pride and festive atmosphere in the 1980s, 1990s and now in the 2000, the difference, is stark. I still remember proudly salutely my flag, whenever I see one in 1980s and 1990s. In those days, it was very hard to get approval for displaying the National flag. There was a strong sense of belonging. Every Singaporean is proud to identify with each other. And Singaporeans are a very loving tribe. New guys get accepted, once you display your pink IC or red passport.
So what happened to our National flag?
It is not the foreigners' fault. They have no obligation to put up OUR flag. And no, not most foreigners live in condominums, foreign "talent" according to Singapore labour laws can be anyone employed as a CEO to someone who sweeps the floor and clears my tables. I don't need to take a snipe here, but this "talent" obviously has not understood our Singapore society enough, to draft a sensible letter to the papers.
And that is exactly the problem.
The sudden huge influx of new immigrants who no longer identify or celebrate "Singapore" as defined by the main body, find it hard to integrate. While the main body moves and hums along like woodwork, too systematic to understand how to communicate with the new additions.
This, on top of highly indiscriminate and too liberal issuing of labour passes to "talents".
"Singapore needs foreign talents, especially in areas like IT and finance where it is lacking." So commented an Indian national in the Sunday Times, 24 August 2008. And how does Singapore lack in IT and finance profesisonals? Let me just take for example, India. I met an Indian banking Director here on conference. I commented that India's banking and financial sector is too enclosed and off limits to foreigners. His answer is, that the entire India banking sector is worth about USD100 million. Liberalising it, will be a catastrophe of Indian banks being bought out in 15 minutes.
Protectionism, is not good. But if we do not ensure our people do not get sufficient opportunities at being exposed and trained in crucial sectors, obviously, we will never have enough "talents". Then we have to import "talents" from protectionist countries, whose "talents" may not necessary be as good as those we rejected, for lack of opportunities.
In his National Day rally this year, Prime Minister Lee said " ... many of us think foreigners are here to depress our wages, this is not so..." and about 10 minutes later, he continued with "... and we have to let them employ more foreigners, to help them cut costs..."
And a few days ago, the papers reported that Singapore had an increase of millionaires and billionaires.
Late one night before National Day, I heard strange sounds in the corridor. It was members of the Residents' Committee (RC) hanging flags along the corridor. I salute them for the hard work. I would have been among those who will not bother with the flag.
Why put up something, I can hardly relate to anymore? The Singaporean identity is so diluted, I can no longer define who I am, and why is it that I am so.
Maybe we do have to slow down some. Talk to each other, build the bond. Doesn't matter if there will only be 4 million Singaporeans 5 years later, still. What matters is, we will have 4 million people who will hang out the flags, with pride. August 07 PathwaysIt have been ten months, slightly more, since I found time. It must have been busy, my memory cannot recall the hustlings of the past few months.
Discussions have been on around me on the topic of kids, marriage, and singlehood.
All listed in reverse, because a single can never make an objective evaluation on the choice between singlehood and marriage, and a childless (by choice) couple, cannot never understand personally the difference between having kids and not.
Thank you for the lively and sincere discussions all my friends. Singles, married and those with lovely little ones. We have all made our choices, most are happy the way we are. For the confused ones, the answer lies inside you.
My opinion? I rather stay single, if I were to choose again. No, don't get me wrong. I love my wife dearly, my kid is a blessing I can never repay. And I can never regret for the wonderful family I have now. But the choice of singlehood is made for some simple reasons.
1) Money. Yup, pure and simple. Singles can get on with less. They can ask for lower salaries and steal everyone's job application, just like getting an easy cheapskate entry VISA to another country while planning your next big leap while sabotaging the current population living on OMG mega difficulties called the 30 year unreachable HDB loans. Then again we might throw in reservist duties for good measure, and IPPT, and RT, and mobilisation, and your own insurance for performing national feats of security for the purpose (as a by-product) of the career and promotion of some other heavily paid (pegged to top industry sources) scholistically inclined intellectuals, who will stump your career advancement because they needed a retirement job, but cannot compete on equal footing, hence needing some divine intevention.
Singles can "sponge" off their parents, rather than pay property taxes on "subsidised housing" on rental payments we probably never earned.
All these result in higher savings, less stressful life and better holidays. Less stressed people of course perform better at work and get better career advancement. And bigger holidays and better mood gains you more friends and networks for career advancement and more money.
2) Mobility. The old line of "so what are you going to do about it" from certain highly intellectual people always challanges us to "look wider and broader". Globalisation is a trend. Being mobile means you can choose to follow the business cycles and jobs rather than stay in one country and wait out the business cycles. It again allows you to hop onto the easy cheapskate entry VISA to sabotage the current population by jumping in and out of countries and economies while demanding for better treatment. Except probably, you don't need to ask for better treatment if you are that good anyway.
And you can refuse bad rubbish from top level Management who never makes a mistake on portfolio assignment and talent recognition, which in a way affects productivity, hence company profits, hence salaries. Not theirs anyway.
Everyone of us appreciates the freedom to give a finger when we need to.
3) Again money. Recurring ones too. This is for those of us choosing between a kid, kids, or none at all. Milk power, children clothings (whose shop owners are held against the wall by rental), extra classes (because almost every other kid is going), medical, future education, moving to more expensive estates and volunteering in schools to get your kid into them. Especially that last point. Takes time away from you for your darling spouse and kids who you are ironically trying to provide better for, and affects your work.
It almost feel heroic, for taking on the (additional) responsibilities of the nation's thrust for a larger population.
But hey, no.
I chose it. I got married because I love my wife, so much. I must be with her for the rest of my life. It might be a fleeting stability of 30-50 years, depending on how much longer I am kept on this world. But it is eternal for every day it happens.
We chose it. We took on kids, because we feel complete with them. We love them so. Because we wanted kids.
And finally no. The nation cannot entice anyone who cannot fulfill the career and monetary needs to have kids. At least not today's educated workforce. Not more maternalty or paternalty leave (though we can do with more), not just baby bonus.
Take away that stress of life, and life will proceed with itself.
That roof over our heads don't need to cost so much. Please subsidise if you use that word in the real sense. A discount, is a discount, especially if it provides you with profits, huge profits.
Membership can get enticing, only if it has its priviledges. The larger, the better. But of course, we are gracious people too. Cheapening it for the experience of it, is bad marketing and stupid brain childs by desparate smoking guns learned only in the worst Business Schools not available in top notch systems designed by top notch talents of Singapore.
And if an old wheel which still operates but cannot fit into the turbo power plant you are trying to operate, please, it's time to change it, or put it into a museum. Not retrofit the plant to fit the wheel. Especially if you think you deserve to be a top Management of the plant as a second career when you retire. At least, try to understand the plant, first.
And yes. I'd still be single. If I had not met my wife. |
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